Shopping While Depressed Can Become Really Depressing
Posted on November 16, 2007
Have you ever had one of those down days when you were bored stiff or struggling emotionally to find something to lighten your spirits? I think most of us experience feelings like this at times. I’d been thinking about writing about this phenomenon for several weeks, but an experience at a social event last week prompted me to do it now. I overheard a lady, I’ll just call her Alice, talking with a friend and what I overheard her say was exactly what I’d been thinking about. She said that when she felt down in the dumps she liked to go shopping because buying something new improved her frame of mind.
I like to think of myself as a logical person who isn’t prone to making rash decisions, but I have to confess, I’ve bought a few things in my lifetime for much the same reason; I thought the purchases would make me feel better. One of these was a whole shop full of woodworking tools. I bought them shortly after an illness had hospitalized me for several weeks and I was down in the dumps and didn’t have the energy to do many of the things I had done before getting sick. I made an emotional decision to buy the tools thinking they would give me something to do around the house and make me feel better. My logic was that at least I wouldn’t be bored stiff and I could be doing something besides moping around feeling sorry for myself. They were very expensive power tools that I haven’t used a half dozen times in the last 15 years.
Unlike Alice, I was fortunate enough to have the money to pay cash for the tools or I might have been singing the same tune she was. I heard her tell her friend that her husband was going to kill her (not literally) because of the credit card charges she had run up on her most recent shopping spree. She said they would be making payments for several months to pay for the things she purchased. That’s not a very pleasant thought, is it?
As I listened to Alice, I thought to myself�here’s another case of someone with that dread S.T.I.T. disease. In case you aren’t familiar with it, it’s Spending Tomorrow’s Income Today, and it’s addictive and it afflicts way too many Americans. It’s a disease that’s spread by merchants spending millions of dollars to hype their products in a way that tap into the emotional desires of consumers. Automobile and drug companies are at the top of my list of industries that are the best at spreading S.T.I.T.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you should forego the pleasure of shopping or of purchasing something you really want. It can be quite invigorating if done with forethought and planning rather than being lured into S.T.I.T. by slick talking salespeople or glitzy ads. When this happens, the joy of purchasing can fade fast when the misery of making payments every month sets in. That’s how shopping while bored or depressed can become really depressing.
Here’s a tip! We’ve all heard that you should save for a rainy day, so why not save for a boring or depressing day? I learned this little secret many years ago after going in debt to buy a boat I really didn’t need. I struggled for months, many of which the boat was parked in the yard and of no use, before I finally got it paid off. Yeah, it was fun that first summer, but when I had to take money I could have used to go snow skiing to make the payments in the winter, it became rather depressing. By the next season, the new had worn off, but the payments kept coming. It wasn’t nearly so much fun the second year and by the time the loan was paid I was ready to sell the boat.
That experience, nearly 40 years ago, taught me a very valuable lesson. Sometimes learning what not to do can be better than learning what to do! I promised myself that I wouldn’t make that mistake again. It was a hard lesson, but it taught me the value of putting aside some money each month into what I call my “Mad Money Fund.” As long as I had the money to pay for those “pick-me-up” purchases without going in debt, even a bad emotional decision would only effect today, not tomorrow and the months to come. That’s how I survived that stupid purchase of the power tools. I was able to chalk it off as a bad decision, but not one that impacted my future income.
Try setting up a “Mad Money fund” to use during those trying times when a pick-me-up purchase is needed to get you through boredom or a period of depression. It doesn’t have to be anything formal. It can be as simple as a jar in which you save loose change or a few dollars stuck away under the mattress. Of course, setting up a bank account and making regular deposits into it will allow you to earn a little interest on the money, but what’s important is doing whatever works for you. Having some money you can fall back on for a dinner out, a new dress or a set of golf clubs will definitely lift your spirits.
A good way to avoid S.T.I.T. is to avoid shopping while you’re bored or depressed. If you can’t do that, the next best thing you can do is to have a “Mad Money Fund” so you don’t have to go in debt. It’s those spur of the moment purchases that people make during emotionally weak moments that cause many of them to slip into a depressing cycle of debt.
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